Tom in a padded room while waiting to write some skits.

What if the colonist had fought the Battle of Bunker Hill using silverware?

Another obscure history reference for today’s play. I’m happy it turned out in our favor. Enjoy.

Paul Snead telling people what to do. (In a good way)

Way back then, a bunch of us who thought we were funny, hopped on the morning radio bandwagon and created his comedy homage to old time radio we called ‘Purely Coincidental’

Later we wrote and took over other empires, but in early ’82, we pretty much had our tentacles in all the media on the Syracuse University campus.

PC was our excuse to cut loose and fool around on the radio twice a week. We rotating writing duties and people from our TV comedy show, so it became a fun way to blow off steam from the weekly live to tape video show.

Lots of puns, oddball characters, and it was pre-taped, so we could listen at home when we got up in the morning. What’s not to like?  Enjoy.

‘Gunfight – Part 1 & 2′  Written by Paul Snead. Featuring Brad Lowry, Paul Snead, Tom Giarrosso, Dave Walzer, Larry Cook, and Bob Cullinan. Engineered by Mike Shore

What if the Incredible Hulk asked or a Small Business Loan

The Boffo Yux Dudes in a much younger era

Poor Bruce Banner. He’s not only being chased for a murder he didn’t commit, he also has a terrible problem funding his research while keeping one step ahead of the law. What is a struggling scientist to do?  Pat and I did this one at the WHEB-FM studios in Portsmouth in the early 90s. Enjoy.

What if John Lennon was Captain of the Starship Enterprise?

I love the photo trickery from rabittooth.com. Check it out!

Photo from an amazing artist at Rabittooth.com
Go check out his manipulations!

I always loved doing Star Trek skits. I broke down and bought a bunch of original music and SFX cds in the 80′s, so we could make them sound that much more authentic. Though my Spock impression is a little lame needs work, I think the skit still holds up.

Russ from RockingJamboree posted a tweet about the BYD’s old Trek bits, so I thought I’d dust this one up since it was a Monday. Now I’ll have to find the Trek Thanksgiving Special to add to the mayhem. Enjoy

I do hope there will be a discount on this voyage. Otherwise it might not be a cheery trip to it's destination.

Alfred has more words of wisdom – In honor of his birthday, here’s 4 nuggets for you to peruse. Enjoy!

A Fixer Upper.

(Lay Around the) Caddy

Well, I just got back from chooglin’
Down Mississippi way
And the boss man won’t get hold of me
If I got somethin’ to say

I’m-a livin’ in my Caddy
My good ol’ Detroit wheels
I got what I need and what I don’t have
I can beg, borrow or steal

chorus:
Lay around the Caddy, boy, kickin’ up my feet
I’m fishin’ out the back window if I need sumpin’ t’eat
Snoozin’ in the front seat, keep my banjo in a tree
‘Cause the back seat’s for my baby and me

I’m livin’ up the good life
Got everything I need
the 9 to 5 is far behind
with avarice and greed

I just need my baby
and then we’re good to go
We don’t need no engine
to watch the river flow.

So climb on in here mama,
We’ll have a real good time
The beers are in the cooler
And catfish on the line

And when the full moon rises
We’ll bed down for the night
Left to our own devices
The stars our bedside light

Just you and me all cozy
In our rusted iron bed
We’ll have no need to mosy
Where the noise just hurts your head

It may not get up to speed
But baby, apart from you,
My Caddy’s all I need
This Caddy is just big enough for two

Honey, Get That Junk Outta The Trunk!

It was 1952
Five thousand years ago
A met a girl, she had a car
On a drive we did go

There was a monkey at the wheel
And a razor in my brain
I took control and drove off the road
In the pouring rain

Chorus:

Car
Car
Car
Car

Slippy slippy slippery went the tones on my tail
She cried and laughed and tumbling we went
Another crack from you and you’ll end up in jail
And I won’t have the cash to pay the rent

Deterministic random faces accuse me as I walk
Without you though I’m carrying your head
The grass grows round the car crash from so many years ago
You’re lucky I didn’t wind up dead

I miss you my co-pilot when you’re not there
Which is often meaning everytime I wake
I’m a bit confused about the purpose that you wear
If I weren’t crazy that’s all I could take

Look upon my windshield mortals tremble as I break
The windows rusting grass upon the wheels
The energy you shed will quickly run into the night
I think I understand just how you feeled

Don't put the Bronto Ribs on the side! Don't Do It!

Borrowing mom’s car totally blew
It really sucked on ice
But if you wanna be cool
You gotta pay the price

A friend of a friend of a guy I know
Had a car to sell
I had some extra cash to blow
So I said what the hell

Chorus:
My first car was a thrill
It even looked good sitting still
But on the road it was a joke
It filled the county with blue smoke
So I spent all I had
Then it didn’t look too bad
Then I went and spent some more
Now I just can’t be ignored

It used to be a four door
But now I only got two
The hood was red, the tail was white
And both the doors were blue

The steering kept pulling to the left
And boy it really sucked
It had the power of a Yugo
And the handling of a truck

Chorus

You can hear my bass for miles
I ain’t got no treble
I got it riding so low
I can feel every pebble

I jacked it up and I chopped it down
Now it’s a mean machine
Now you just sit back and listen
To my tires scream

Chorus

Look ma! No Rust!

BAYOU CADILLAC

You’re the prettiest girl on the bayou
I know you done heard that before
But how’d you like to get a new V-8
And trade in that old four on the floor

I’m a simple man with simple tastes
I only accept the very best
Baby, you’re just like a Cadillac
So how’s about a little road test?

Bayou Cadillac
I want to buy you a Cadillac
My, you’d look good in a Cadillac
If I were to buy you a Cadillac

I know you’d look good with a Caddy
I don’t mean the kind that plays golf
I hope you don’t mind a convertible
‘Cause I’d love to see you take down your top

Now baby, I could teach you some driving
Tricks that you would love to learn
So come on over to my racetrack
And we’ll both make some rubber burn

Bayou Cadillac
I want to buy you a Cadillac
My, you’d look good in a Cadillac
If I were to buy you a Cadillac

Featuring Jeff MacDougall on Bass, Dave Leigh from Dr. Lindyke on Keys, and Tom attempting to gargle on vocals.

Tom Waits in his 70's Coupe DeVille. Photo by Anton Corbin

Cadillac Coupe DeVille

Detroit Iron, two tons flyin’
Powering up hill
Jet black, get back Jack
Cadillac Coupe de Ville

Vows to keep, it made men weep
A dream you couldn’t kill
Super wide, a nation’s pride
Cadillac Coupe De Ville

Lean, obscene, a mean machine
A boyhood’s dream fulfilled
The urge you feel in solid steel
Cadillac Coupe De Ville

Road dog, gas hog,
A wish that’s built to thrilll
This road warrior never looked sorrier
Cadillac Coupe De Ville

Freeway, Leeway
Send the kids the bill
Broken trust, Creeping rust
Cadillac Coupe de Ville

It pulled the load, it ruled the road
But now it’s sitting still
Off the track, with no attack
Cadillac Coupe de Ville

This is your Daddy’s Caddy, laddie